When one spouse is in the military, often times that career becomes the central point to the other members of the family.  Where the family lives, what kind of work the spouse does, and when family vacations are planned.  The military spouse, however, doesn't just sit around.  Military families are very busy and military spouses often have many obligations other than their spouse's service.  Many military spouses choose to volunteer because it's something fulfilling and meaningful to do that has more of a flexibile schedule - which is key in the service.

Volunteering also allows the spouse to meet a variety of people they wouldn't have met otherwise and form friendships with people from outside the base.  Not only that but volunteering lets you use the skills you have and develop new skills that can help you find a job or just grow as a person.  In addition, when you're moving around all the time, it can be tough to feel a connection to a new city or country even.  Volunteering lets you get a chance to feel involved in a community.

Why else do mil spouses volunteer?

When it comes to what military men and women can and cannot do in uniform, the list seems to go on forever.  For instance, it is against the rules to chew gum, talk on your cell phone, put your hands in your pockets, and carry an umbrella while wearing the military uniform.  With this in mind, there is nothing formally written banning the act of breastfeeding a child.  New photos depicting this act have been released and are causing quite a stir.

Terran Echegoyen McCabe and Christina Luna both posed breastfeeding their children while wearing their military garb.  The pictures, while tasteful, are causing a controversy as to whether or not this behavior is appropriate.  Reactions from veterans, military men, woman, and military spouses, are mixed.  Eric Hobard, a veteran, is supportive of these women.  “I salute them both, as soldiers and free American mothers.  I’ve fought for people that I do not know, in countries that have nothing in common with me, and for reasons that our politicians cannot justify. Considering this fact, I’d fight to defend the rights of these two Americans every day of the week,” he said.

Not everyone agrees with Eric.  “If any of my children were hungry I fed them, with my breast, but I didn’t take pictures of me doing it and I wasn’t trying to prove a point... There is a certain level of responsibility that comes with wearing that uniform... Cover up if you are going to be partly naked in a military uniform out of respect for your country and uniform," said veteran Tish Karhoff. 

What do you think of these images?

Because of financial hardships, a desire to help others, and a regard for loyalty, there is a job trend spreading around military bases: surrogacy.  Many military wives are finding a way to aid couples that can't have children by stepping in and being a surrogate.  Many times, it has to do with a need for money.  Being a surrogate pays anywhere from $20,000-$40,000, that's not including medical costs.  Medical costs, however, seem to be the one thing causing the most controversy in this whole job.

Tricare specifically states, like most medical providers, that it does not cover medical costs for surrogates.  With that in mind, Tricare is notorious for often letting these surogacies slip through the cracks.  Many surrogates take advantage of this and use it to help keep costs down for the couple they are helping.  “We have 9.5 million beneficiaries, and our beneficiaries will have roughly 2,100 births every week. We have to be focused on making sure everybody gets their care,” says a Tricare representative. “We can’t be a big police force.”

Do you think this is abusing the system or do you think the surrogates are doing a good thing by helping other couples?

Holidays are never the same when a loved one is missing and military families have to feel their absence during a holiday at some point or another.  When a dad or mom is missing Halloween, they won't see the kids in their costumes, be able to take them trick or treating, or get to stuff their faces full of candy.  Even so, there are ways to incorperate them into the holiday even if they're not physically there. 

We've touched on creating care packages for the men and women overseas, but Halloween is a great time to theme out the gift package.  Here are some fun ideas to put in the box:

• Halloween candy (just no chocolate...it melts!)

• Halloween decorations (streamers, caution tape, etc.)

• Fake blood

• Plastic rat, bat, or snakes

• Glow sticks

• Ghosts

• Purple or orange lights

• Plastic pumpkins

• Markers & stickers to decorate

• Spiders & spider webs

• Halloween toys

• Silly string

• Gum eyeballs

• Mask

• Wig

• Costume

• Funny teeth

• Face paint

• Scary movies

• Scary music

• Halloween crossword puzzles

• Halloween craft

• Family pictures (of past Halloweens)

• Halloween themed paper and pens

• Halloween themed games

• Pillsbury Halloween themed cookies

• Orange and black rice krispie treats

What else would you include?

First Lady Michelle Obama and Second Lady Jill Biden have begun a program to not aid military members by supporting their families.  A series of PSAs are being recorded that salute the men, women, and children that stand behind our servicemen and women.  The goal of these public service announcements is to show true stories of the family members left behind when their parents, children, spouses, and siblings go off to war. 

"The entertainment community answered the Joining Forces call and has done what they do best -- bring to life stories that move us," Obama said. "Through this PSA campaign, Americans will learn more about the unique challenges and needs of our military families, see their strength, resilience and service, and find out how they can give back to these extraordinary troops and families who have given us so much."

Do you think having celebs involved will help bring attention to military families?

Much like the military has regulations on how your spouse must keep their hair and how they should dress, they also have rules on how they must act while in uniform.  Because of these rules, there are certain restrictions you must follow as well in order to show your support of him as a military spouse.  Your decorum while he's dressed in his uniform reflects on him both as a husband and as a service member.  Here are a few dos and don'ts to keep in mind.

Do:

• Walk on your husband’s left side so he can salute others.
• Refer to your spouse by his first name or nickname, or as “my husband.”  Do not refer to your husband as “Capt. Smith” or “the Captain.”
• Stand at a public function or ceremony when the senior officer enters and is announced.   This applies to everyone in attendance.
• Offer your husband an umbrella in the rain, but only if it’s black. He’s not allowed to carry any other color.
• Push the baby carriage or stroller so your spouse doesn’t have to.  It’s considered “unmilitary” to do so while in uniform.
• Help your spouse carry any packages or bundles to make it easier for him to salute.  (Are you wondering if a man made up these rules so that wives would have to do all the heavy lifting?)

Don’t:

• Show public displays of affection, except at homecomings and goodbyes.  This includes kissing and holding hands.
• Offer your spouse a piece of gum.  It is not “military” for him to chew it.  The same goes for smoking while in uniform.
• Allow him to put his hands in his pockets unless he is placing or retrieving an item.
• Refer to your husband’s orders as “our orders” unless you are a service member yourself.
• Offer him food or drink while he’s walking.  He should not be eating, drinking or using a cell phone while walking in uniform.
• Refer to others in the service as “sir” or “ma’am,” even if your spouse does.  Refer to them by their rank and last name (“Capt. Smith”).
• Allow your child to wear your spouse’s uniform for Halloween.  Uniforms bearing insignia, badges and tabs should be worn only by authorized personnel.

What others can you think of?  Did you know any of these already?

Disney is one of the many corporations to honor our troops and their families.  "The Mouse House" offers discounts - from park admission to hotel stays.  There's even a free character breakfast on November 1st at Shades of Green, an exclusive hotel for military families located near Walt Disney World in Florida.  Here are some of the amenities Disney offers for our troops:

• 40% off select hotel rooms with military ID
• 3-day park hopper passes for $99 or 4-day pass for $138
• Discounts on Disney Cruise Lines
• Access to an exclusive military family hotel "Shades of Green"

What a good way to forget the worries and stress of the war than by visiting the happiest place on Earth?

Have you ever taken part in the Disney military family weekends?  Would you want to?

TLC is now making Mondays a real tearjerker...but not for the obvious reasons.  Their new show "Surprise Homecoming" is one hour full of loved ones returning from overseas to surprise their families who miss them greatly.  Service Men and Women, with help from Billy Ray Cyrus, think of creative ways for letting their families know they're home safe and sound.  From showing up at college graduations and their children's schools to sneaking up behind their mom at a restaurant, this show never ceases to bring out a smile or a tear. Have you seen this show? What about had your own surprise homecoming? Tell us all about it!