Has anyone just felt lost or unremembered? I can definitely relate to you in a lot of ways.  Sometimes I feel like my family can be inconsiderate of my needs as far as school or even ordering food that I cant eat on purpose because ill end up having a flare up if I eat it. I pretty much do the majority of the cooking and cleaning in my house. When I flare up after eating spicy foods different types of pizza theres a list of stuff I cant eat. Tonight my brother decides to order pizza for the family and orders enough pizza but gets this strange kind that I cant eat. Everyone around me is eating pizza and thank god I had extra cube steaks so i fried one of those up and made some pasta but I feel kind of hurt and slighted. I feel like sometimes i have to consider everyones elses needs other than my own and they cant even remember to be considerate as far as ordering something I can eat. Hell let it be quiet enough so I can study which they love to yell and scream while im studying especially when im looking at videos online.

Anyways the purpose of this blog is not only for me to vent my frustrations but to reach out to everyone in the community because if im going through these types of challenges it does affect your self esteem and even your motivation for studying. Is there anyone else who has felt lost in the stream so to speak and needs someone on their side? Please let me know because I would love to be YOUR ambassador and make YOU feel appreciated. We are all human beings and we all need to feel loved and appreciated and I know this is a sad depressing world. Is there someone who puts them down for going back to get their high school diploma? YOU CAN DO IT. Sometimes family can be your own worst enemies! I love mine dearly but sometimes they work AGAINST me instead of CHEERLEADING for me to do it.

Just so some of you can relate a couple of months ago my mom told me to drop out of ashworth because I cant afford it and there are more important things to focus on. What could be more important than getting your education? Hell I almost dropped out and thanks to Steph and Danny both encouraging me to stay focused I am still on track and more focused than ever. Do I have all the answers? Of course not! I can take some frustrations in my own life and blog about them and hope that someone can relate to them or that it helps someone else....

Beauty can be what is on the outside.. The problem is society puts too much emphasis on physical beauty instead of inner beauty. Looking like Brad Pitt or Angelina Jolie is great but if your attitude is ugly then it makes all of you ugly.. I just wanted to blog my thoughts on this topic as I have personally gone through many experiences being teased or made fun of growing up, or being mistreated in a relationship. I want to encourage everyone dont settle just to be in a relationship. You have to love yourself first before a potential spouse can love you! My best friend puts it succinctly," You should take yourself on dates with yourself and get to know yourself so that when the right person comes along they will know how to treat you because you treat yourself well."

When I was younger, I suffered from bulimia. I hope in sharing this that I can help someone else who has an eating disorder or someone who knows someone who is suffering from one. I got started when I was in the 9th grade because I thought the boy I had a crush on would fall in love with me if I was skinny. Honestly that was the furthest thing from the truth! I almost died and was hospitalized when I was in the 10th grade. I had whittled away to 88 pounds which was not normal or ok for me. I was depressed because I let my family and friends down at that time, but most of all I let myself down.

I beg anyone who reads this to take a look and see how much do you value physical beauty over inner beauty? Dont look down on someone because they may not physically be the most attractive person, instead see all of the good and positive things that they bring to this world and smile and say hello. You never know that could end up being a valuable person in your life...

Sometimes I do the readers journals in my english course because I love english and want to get the most out of my education and one of the entries asked the question: What causes people to fall in love? I think that there are multiple factors that cause people to fall in love A lot of people mix up and confuse love and lust. Some people generally do fall in love at first sight but it is very rare. Love is a very strong emotion, and some people are addicted to the rush or high that love brings. I do believe in falling in love but I also dont want to fall into a trap either. I will be a very lucky female if I get to experience true love in my lifetime. What is true love and I wonder what it feels like!?